Behind the bars
by Snafu
Summary: A child of my boredom. Quick fic with Sirius in Azkaban, pondering the years gone by.


DISCLAIMER: I own none of the characters, nor do I own the situation they are in. All I can call my own is the way in which I've put them into it, and I'm not making any money off of it. Y'all know what JK Rowling owns, don't you?  
  
A/N: I don't really remember writing this... it's old. but I still like it. It could use a revision I know, but I'm lazy. It was one of those things that got written to get me back in a writing mood. And I lurve Sirius. heh.  
  
It's been two years. Two long, lonely years in Azkaban. Over and over, I thought about what had happened. What I'd done to James and Lily.  
  
"James, it's perfect!" I remembered saying. "No one would ever suspect that Peter, of all people, was your secret-keeper! Even if Voldemort comes after me, you'll still be safe."  
  
"Well, I don't know. Peter? You think he could handle that? How about Remus? Still, I'd really prefer you would do it."  
  
"But I'm telling you, it'll work absolutely perfectly! Besides, you know, Dumbledore thinks someone close to you is in contact with Voldemort. And I think, well, it may be Remus. I mean, I've never judged him by the fact that he's a werewolf before, but you never know."  
  
Just then, Lily had walked into the room.  
  
"Sirius? Why are you here? Is something wrong?"  
  
"Lily, I was thinking. If you use Peter as the Secret-Keeper, without telling anyone you switched, you'll be so much safer than if everyone knows it's me."  
  
"I guess. James?"  
  
"Alright. Sirius talked me into it. But. it just doesn't feel right."  
  
"Ah, it's ok, Prongs. You're just nervous. I'll see you. Well, I don't know when. After you come out of hiding."  
  
And those were the last words I said to James and Lily Potter.  
  
I remember almost nothing about the next few days. I was too worried about James. I remember checking on Peter, making sure he was ok. I think Remus wanted me to do something with him, get my mind off of James and Lily. But I guess I made up an excuse not to go.  
  
One day, I went to go see Peter. He didn't answer the door, so I let myself in.  
  
"Peter?" I called. But even after I searched the house, he wasn't there. I began walking towards the door, then I realized something and froze. "God no. he didn't. Peter, no." I looked towards the sky, looking for a sign that I was wrong. I ran all the way to my house, hopped onto my motorcycle, and hurried to Godric's Hollow. But all I found was a ruined house, James and Lily laying lifeless in the heaps of destroyed furniture, mounds of the fallen walls. I didn't cry. Not because I would have been embarrassed, but because I just couldn't. I was in shock.  
  
Taking a deep breath, I got off my motorcycle. I could here a baby crying. 'Harry,' I thought to myself. 'He must still be alive!' I followed the sound of crying until I found little Harry huddled next to his mother, wailing. Probably mostly from the pain in his forehead; I could see a nasty cut there. "Shhh, come on, Harry, it's gonna be alright." I picked him up. That was when I heard someone behind me. I turned around, and saw Hagrid behind me.  
  
"Hagrid, they're-" Suddenly , I couldn't take it anymore. I just broke down into tears. Still holding Harry, I fell into his outstretched arms. I looked up, and saw tears in his beard. After a minute or two, we dried our eyes, and he began talking.  
  
"Sirius, Dumbledore wanted me to take Harry. That's him you're holding?"  
  
I nodded. Hagrid, let me take him, I'm his Godfather. James appointed me guardian if-" Hagrid cut me off.  
  
"I know all that, but Dumbledore said something about special arrangements. And I'm sure you'll be able to visit him."  
  
I sighed. I knew arguing would be useless. And besides that, I just didn't have it in me to fight back. "Alright. But take my motorcycle. It'll get you to Dumbledore faster, and I don't really need it."  
  
"You sure? You love that thing."  
  
"Take it, Hagrid. I'm going to find Remus. Good bye."  
  
Iwaved goodbye to Harry and began walking down the road. Though I don't remember much of what happened. The next thing I remember, I was in the middle of a street, standing in front of Peter..  
  
"Sirius, how could you?!" He wailed. It actually sounded like he was innocent. Next thing I knew, he had pulled out his wand and blasted the entire street into ruins. I saw him do something with his hands, and then. he was gone. Wizards from the Ministry would be coming now. I heard them coming. I didn't even bother to try running, I didn't care anymore. Two of my best friends were dead, another had turned to Voldemort, and Remus and I. Well when I thought he was the traitor I tried to avoid him. I've heard the rumors about how I started laughing then, though. Hah. Yes, I was walking along to be locked up, giggling. I didn't make a sound for a week, and people think I was laughing?  
  
Now I'm sitting here in my cell. The dementors are walking near me, too close. They don't trust me. No one does, not anymore. My only chance left is if someone finds Peter. Chances are that won't happen, though.  
  
A/N: Soooo you know you want to review, don't you? lol ok I'll shut up now. Hope you enjoyed. 


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